26 February 2008

Love and Let Go

"...the great need for...loving-kindness toward oneself, and developing from that the awakening of a fearlessly compassionate attitude toward our own pain and that of others."
"...dissolving the dualistic tension between us and them, this and that, good and bad, by inviting what we usually avoid. My teacher, Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche, described this as 'leaning into the sharp points.'"
"...may we not forget...that 'Chaos should be regarded as extremely good news."
from When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times, Pema Chodron
Yes, yes, yes.

25 February 2008


I just spent an hour on the phone with my health insurance provider, straightening out my complex maze of doctor bills. For many years, I've tried to do at least one good deed every day. I recently upped that ante to 3. My second good deed of the day was to be patient and cordial with the insurance guy who helped me get it all cleared up. He was obviously surprised when I thanked him and wished him a good day, even though we came up with another $900 in bills I have to pay. I'm certain he talks with a lot of angry people every day and I hope our conversation makes his day a little better. My previous good deed today was traffic-related. One more to go.

I happened to see Elizabeth Edwards on television over the weekend and was once again impressed with her positive energy and commitment to getting on with life, even though she battles Stage 4 breast cancer. "She's my hero," I thought. Lance Armstrong is also my hero. Before I was diagnosed with breast cancer, I had absolutely no heroes. Now I do. I have three.

I discovered that I am my own hero.