12 February 2008

Silence on the Home Front

Having some suicidal ideation today. Very unusual. I haven't had that happen in years. Trying to survive breast cancer doesn't allow time for thoughts of intentionally dying. Friends please note: I will not check out. Thinking does not equal doing.

Still all quiet on the home front. I pointed out that Hubby lacks initiative. I won't apologize for saying it and I won't retract it. He sees the world from his own limited point of view and believes that failing to seek employment every day, not doing any housework, not doing any yard work, not doing laundry, not cooking does not constitute lack of initiative. Hence, he feels quite justified in the silent treatment. He clearly doesn't remember who he's married to.

I'm still buried in paperwork. It turns out that the client for whom much of the paperwork is being done may be going belly up. Crazy Land employment would then be in jeopardy.

Hmmm....can't imagine why I'm down.

11 February 2008

Monday, Bloody Monday

Hubby is angry with me and hasn't spoken to me since late afternoon Thursday. It's a highly triggering situation, mirroring a period in my early teens when no one in my house spoke to me for a couple of months. I'm reminding myself that I don't live in danger anymore. Not speaking is simply not speaking.

Today, I'm bogged down with a pre-qualification questionnaire from one of our clients. If I were to gaze into my crystal ball, I'd predict this is going to keep me bogged down for a bit.

The problem with working through lunch is that I tend to forget the lunch part.